My Wardrobe, Myself

I Had a Style Epiphany This Week

Debbie Roes

March 22, 2024

I had an important style epiphany yesterday. It was born out of frustration and upset, but I think my life will end up being easier because of what I learned. In today’s post, I’ll share what happened, why I initially felt so disheartened, and what lessons I took from my experience.

style epiphany, lessons learned

Trying Out a New Style

We’ll start at the beginning… A few months ago, I purchased some wide-leg jeans. I did so in an effort to “broaden my horizons” by trying new styles. I hadn’t worn any wide pants or jeans for close to a decade, but I did like them at one time. Because wider-hemmed styles are currently “on trend,” they’re available all over the place. I thought it might be nice to try something new and potentially “evolve my style” a bit.

The purchase of the new jeans was before reader Sally from St. Paul’s insightful commentary on my shopping and style. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, check out my post from last month on how we shop versus how we dress. To make a long story short, I have tended not to be as “picky” about the items I buy compared to what I actually wear on a regular basis. I’m highly selective about what I wear, which is why I’ve often ended up with so many wardrobe “benchwarmers” over the years. Sally suggested that I start applying the same level of discernment when shopping as when I’m getting dressed for the various occasions in my life.

Sally’s sage advice was simple yet powerful, and it immediately resulted in my returning five recent purchases that were still within their return windows. Unfortunately, however, I couldn’t return the wide-leg jeans since too much time had passed. I wish I’d had the presence of mind to take the wide-leg jeans back to the store before the window of opportunity closed, but I stubbornly held on to them for months, believing that I would be able to “make them work.”

Five Returns I Made After My Last Post

Debbie Roes

11 comments

February 29, 2024

Today’s essay is basically a follow-up to my last one, about the issue of shopping the way we dress – or not. After realizing that I’ve often been a lot more selective with what I wear compared to what I purchase and/or keep, I decided to take a good, hard look at my recent purchases to see if I might avoid mistakes like the ones I wrote about last month.

Return windows are getting narrower at many retailers, but fortunately I was able to identify five items that I could still take or send back to the retailer for a refund. In this post, I’ll share those pieces and my reasons for returning them. They were all “close but no cigar,” which is frequently a defining characteristic of the wardrobe “benchwarmers” that hang in my closet and rarely get worn. Fully realizing how “picky” I am about what I wear will hopefully help me to minimize those benchwarmers even further and save me both money and guilt!

women with shopping bags making returns to a store

A Wardrobe “White Whale”

We’ll start with an item that’s been on my shopping priorities list for a long time: cool-toned metallic, low-heeled ankle boots. I had purchased a pair that I thought would fit the bill back in 2022, but they turned out to be of low quality and didn’t hold up very well. I was probably too hasty in deciding to keep them, which can happen to many of us when we become weary at trying to fill a gap in our closets. After searching high and low for a specific item for months or even years, it’s common to lower our standards and perhaps “settle” for less than what we truly want.

How We Shop vs. How We Dress

Debbie Roes

25 comments

February 18, 2024

In my last post, I shared what I viewed as my ten worst purchases of 2023. I showed photos of each item and highlighted why I felt it was a mistake to have bought it. I closed out the essay with a summary of the seven lessons I learned through reviewing my ill-advised buys of the previous year.

As usual, I asked readers to share feedback on what I had written, as well as on their own worst purchases of 2023. I always enjoy reading what readers have to say, and I’m fortunate in that I receive thoughtful and insightful comments on my essays. I learn a lot from what readers share, and many of my blog posts over the years have been informed by the comments I receive.

I’m grateful to all those who weighed in on my last post, but one comment in particular has stuck with me the most and really made me think. In fact, I haven’t been able to get it out of my mind! So, in today’s post, I’ll share excerpts of that comment (it was a long one!), as well as my follow-on thoughts to what this very insightful reader had to say.

How selective are you when you shop versus when you get dressed?

Highlights of the Comment

The comment in question came from reader “Sally in St. Paul,” who has her own great style blog called Within a World of My Own. Sally is a regular commenter here whose feedback is always helpful and interesting to read, but she really outdid herself this time. I invite you to go to my last post and read Sally’s comment in its entirety, but I’ll include some highlights here that are especially germane to today’s topic.

My Worst Purchases of 2023

Debbie Roes

20 comments

January 26, 2024

In my last post, I reviewed what I consider to be my best purchases of 2023, including both my at-home and out-and-about items. It was fun and encouraging for me to realize that I had a lot of successes with my wardrobe-related shopping last year. It was also surprising to see so many pairs of pants included within my best purchases, especially since that’s an area of my closet that has traditionally been challenging.

Today’s post won’t be as much fun to write, but it will perhaps be more enlightening and beneficial in the long run. I’m going to share what I consider to be my worst sartorial purchases of 2023. Most of the items reviewed are in the out-and-about category, but there are a few crossover pieces in the mix, too. I’ll show photos of my less-than-successful buys and outline why they didn’t work out for me. I’ll close out the post with an encapsulation of my lessons learned, some of which I’ve had to re-learn multiple times over the years!

An Overview

To start out, here’s a look at the ten garments that I’ve designated as my worst 2023 purchases:

2023 worst purchases - all

Types of Items

By category, here’s how they break down:

5 short-sleeved tops
2 sleeveless tops
1 topper
2 pairs of pants

Where the Items Were Purchased

I also thought it would be interesting to review where I purchased the items in question:

Athleta: 5 items (3 online, 2 in-store)
Talbots: 3 items (all online)
Amazon: 2 items (online, of course)

This doesn’t necessarily mean that I should stop buying clothing from the above retailers, as I’ve also experienced multiple successes in my purchases from them, especially in terms of Athleta. I think the issue may have more to do with the circumstances under which the purchases were made, which I look at in the next section.

My Best Purchases of 2023

Debbie Roes

13 comments

January 19, 2024

Happy New Year, everyone! I hope that 2024 is off to a good start for you. I usually like to begin each year on the blog with a few recap posts related to the previous year. I’m not sure how many of these I’ll do this time around since I’ve had trouble blogging as regularly as I’d like, but I want to at least share my thoughts on my best and worst purchases of 2023.

Which of your 2023 wardrobe purchases get a thumbs up from you?

I’ll start off on a high note with a review of my favorite items that I bought over the course of last year. I was going to limit this round-up to just ten pieces, but as it turns out, I experienced quite a bit of shopping success in 2023 and I’d like to celebrate that.

I’ll divide this post into two sections: my favorite at-home/exercise buys and my favorite out-and-about purchases. I’ll share photos of the items, as well as some thoughts about why I consider each piece to be a successful buy. Wherever possible, I’ll link the items I’m reviewing in case any of you are interested in checking them out (FYI – a few of the links are affiliate links, but most are not).

Favorite At-Home and Exercise Purchases of 2023

I spend the bulk of my time at home and enjoy going on regular walks near where I live and by the bay or ocean, so I’m glad that I’m now paying deeper attention to what I wear for these activities. During 2023, I centered my efforts on finding good outerwear and tops, but I also picked up some other great pieces that I’ll share with you here.